Friday, September 25, 2009

What Kind of Troll Am I?

If you are a reader of blogs about autism, you have seen your share of comments denouncing the views of self advocates around the web. Sometimes they are personal attacks on autistic people. Many rehash the same tired "Not Really Autistic" meme or promote urban myths about the causes of autism. Most feed pervasive stereotypes of one sort or another. Still others are so vile I won't describe them even obliquely.
Most readers of this blog tend to be civil and capable of using reason to make their points. However, if you are someone who enjoys being abusive toward autistic self advocates and those who support their goals, you just might be wondering…What kind of troll am I? Here is a survey so scientifically valid, it is sure to be linked from AoA ASAP.

What Kind of (Autism) Troll Am I?

1. My favorite tactics for engaging in an internet argument are:

a) Logic and reason.
b) Self pity and demands.
c) Cursing and YELLING.
d) Libel and Terroristic Threatening.

2. My definition of autism is:

a) A broad spectrum of conditions evidencing differences in communication, social behaviors and repetitive behaviors or intense restricted interests.
b) Limited by the characteristics I see in my own child.
c) A tragedy, a kidnapping soul stealer, a monster or a train wreck.
d) Mercury poisoning!

3. I often visit the blogs of writers I strongly disagree with because:

a) I believe it is important to learn about a variety of viewpoints.
b) Someone needs to help them see how wrong they are.
c) I do my best to make them look foolish.
d) These people are not entitled to speak. Only I know the truth about autism.

4. When I read a post I disagree with:

a) I go to my own blog and write about the issue.
b) I jump right in and correct the person’s mistake! For example, “I know you think you have been discriminated against, but as the parent of someone like you, only more so, I can assure you that you are wrong again!”
c) I know the person who wrote it is a liar. He/she is not even autistic!
d) I litter the comments section with swear words and insults. They deserve it!

5. My response to someone who asks for respect is:

a) I guess my input isn’t needed here.
b) What are they talking about? I said “person with” autism, didn’t I?
c) What about me??? When do I get respect???
d) You are an &*)#ing &%^#! and you mother is *&#@*!

6. My child is different from the bloggers on the Hub because:

a) The writers on the Hub are all adults.
b) My child is autistic! Not like these fakes!
c) I don't have children, I have a real disability.
d) My child has no abilities or skills whatsoever.

7. No matter how many times you tell me, I will never believe that:

a) People can be so rude.
b) You see autism as a disability.
c) Neurodiversity means recognizing a the full diversity of neurotypes as valid human presentations.
d) Autism Hub blogs are not financed by Big Pharma, the earth is round, and people have landed on the moon.

8. Which of these comments best exemplifies your writing style:

a) "I strongly disagree with your viewpoint!"
b) "I'm sorry if it hurts your feelings, but autism is not some silly little clique as you obviously think it is."
c) "People like you are depriving everyone else of the cure they deserve."
d) "Shut up, you dumb @*^#."

Scoring: Total your responses for each letter. Are they mostly in one category or another? If so, your identity has been revealed! See below for details. Otherwise, you may find that you are a combination of trolltypes or belong to a category not listed here. Either way, don't bother leaving an offensive or libelous comment here. It will be promptly deleted.

Bettroll: Bettroll doesn't mind calling a self advocate any disgusting name he can think of, and may even threaten the lives of those who are too vocal in their self advocacy. Believes autism is an injury that can be cured, but this takes around 75 years. Answers mostly (d).

Lurtroll: This one claims to be silent while speaking loudly and carrying a big chip on his shoulder. Uses phrases like "you people" liberally. Claims to know everything about his favorite bloggers from diagnostic labels to what brand of toilet paper they use. Demands ever more personal information while hiding behind pseudonym. This may be you if most of your answers were (c).

Nottroll: When disagreeing with something, this person is civil about it. His or her comments are rarely deleted or disapproved by blog owners. If you chose mostly (a) answers, you are probably not a troll.

Agritroll: This troll arrives with hoe in hand, ready to dig in the dirt. Some might think she is preparing the soil for new crops. Don’t believe it. Is that a shovel in the back of her pickup? She comes to bury self advocates in her generous piles of manure. If the (b) responses best describe your trolling, this one may be you.

Disclaimer: These trolls are semi-fictional. They are not generally recognized diagnostic categories (though some have been proposed for inclusion in DSM V).


  1. ROFL!

    Recursive Paradox (aka Genderbitch) has also written about trolling in Trolling: The Ultimate Activist Trap.

  2. Thanks, that just made my day.
    Although now I have coffee in my nostrils from laughing. Must remember to read your posts until after breakfast.

  3. Ha ha! Awesome.

    I especially like answer 6c):
    "I don't have children, I have a real disability."

  4. This comment has been removed by a blog administrator.

  5. I agree with Kowalski.:-) Thanks for some needed levity.

  6. 6a) The writers on the Hub are all adults.
    Does that mean I can't join the Autism Hub? I'm planning to start my own blog soon and I'd be really disappointed if I couldn't join the Hub simply because I'm 16.2 years old.

  7. Sadderbutwisergirl,
    I'm not in charge, but I doubt you'd be excluded for that reason. I wouldn't have guessed you were that young!

  8. This comment has been removed by a blog administrator.

  9. This comment has been removed by a blog administrator.

  10. Excellent Bev :) My favorite quote: "Shut up, you dumb @*^#."

  11. Comment moderation on until further notice. I will approve them as soon as possible.

  12. @Bev: "I wouldn't have guessed you were that young!"
    I'm wondering how old you thought I was. I'm just curious because I am thought to be older or younger than I actually am depending on the situation. Sometimes in real life, I am thought to be younger than I really am because of my lack of ease in social matters, speech impediment, and my face, which a friend of mine recently said looked like that of an 11-year-old! Online (especially in neurodiversity matters) and in small gatherings with people mostly older than I am, I am usually thought to be older than I actually am because I tend to talk about ideas, values, and classic literature, a far cry from some of my friends mostly talking about things like what they would do if they were in a hotel room with the Jonas Brothers or whatever.

  13. Ha hahahhahaha HA HA H Ah *gasps for breath* ha ahahahahahah

    please send these to Simon Baron Cohen for inclusion in all further research.

    ahahahhaha hehhehe he he eh!

  14. SBWG, I also thought you were older.

    I put you in your twenties, because you seemed really well-informed about lots of things --- history and literature in particular, though you also strike me as being scientifically literate --- and I foolishly assumed you had to have a college degree or several to be so well-informed. Silly me.

    But no, I don't think there's any rule that the Hub blogs all be by adults --- IIRC, several teenage bloggers have applied for membership, and for all I know there are younger people already on the Hub! So don't let that stop you.

  15. @Lindsay: Wow. I would never have guessed that anyone would assume my age to be so high or for me to have several college degrees. The best explanation I can think of is that I really, sincerely enjoy history, literature, and science. I always look forward to the day I get my history textbook so that I can spend hours reading the whole thing for my own enjoyment and I spend lots of time reading about history online, especially medieval French history because my grandmother particularly enjoys that period in history and I just recently found out that I am a descendant of King Henry I of France and his queen Anne of Russia. I also really enjoy literature because in general, I've always had an affinity for the written word. My grandmother (same one who is into medieval French history) tells stories about how I was reading at one year old and to this day, she often brags about my choices of reading, which include Shakespeare, Hawthorne, Dickens, and Orwell. And some of my choices of reading are scientific. The Origin of Species by Charles Darwin and A Brief History of Time by Steven Hawking, along with science fiction by H. G. Wells, hold prominent places on my bookshelf. And again about reading textbooks for fun, I also read my science textbooks for fun.

  16. @SBWG - I hope you start a blog soon. I like your comments and I'd enjoy your blog.

    @Bev - witty as ever.

  17. @sanabituranima: I already started a blog. Just go to I've got four posts up already!

  18. Oh my goodness, I just read the card!



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