Thursday, May 17, 2007

Eight things I do that are getting on some peoples nerves

Acting so darned autistic, mostly. Here's what I've heard.

1. Photographing rocks and floor tiles. This simply isn't normal. It is clearly something I do in order to appear more autistic than I really am. This is evidenced by the fact I started doing it around the time I realized I was autistic. Cum Hoc Ergo Propter Hoc? Nah...

2. I am even worse at eye contact than I used to be. Another intentional exaggeration? Giving up on life? Or giving up on pretense? You be the judge!

3. Not answering the phone. I let the machine get it. That's what they are for (my opinion). I might call back when I feel up to talking. I never have quite figured out why anyone, autistic or not, is expected to be available for chatting on demand. You see my ways as rude? Tu quoque, friend, I see your insistence on instant chat gratification as just a tad impolite myself. To each her own.

4. I say "meaningless" phrases and repeat myself. Seven times seven is forty-nine. It is. It is. It is. It is. It is. What's that you said about your day at the office again? Wait, didn't that happen yesterday, too? And last week on Tuesday, only that time it came up in your conversation with Rita, and today it was with Mac? You think I don't have this scenario memorized by now? I don't mention that, though. It would be very rude to do so.

5. I spend an awful lot of time writing. If I could have just one day where no one expected me to chitchat or answer any questions, that would be such a gift. Writing isn't a luxury to me. It's my best way of getting things said and helps me to organize my thoughts. Want to hear what I'm saying? You guys read, don't you?

6. Drawing squares in little books. All the time.

7. Sometimes I am asked to do something and I don't do it or I don't do it right away. Noncompliance? Free Will? Let's call the whole thing off?

8. Chirping, rocking, tapping, facial contortions, growling, pacing, odd finger movements. These are so much worse than the things "normal" people do like throat clearing, jangling keys and that lovely sound some people like to make with chewing gum.
I could go on, but eight really is such a lovely number. I am going to perseverate on it right now.


  1. Coming out of lurking to comment here.

    You've reminded us that it's all a question of perspective—the view from where I'm standing, so to speak.


    Love the blog, by the way.

  2. That just made me giggle a little. Some of the things you described remind me of myself. I agree with you completely on the phone thing!

  3. Have I mentioned that I love your lists? I wonder about that 'chatting on demand' thing too.

    I think it is common for some people to start acting 'more autistic' after they are diagnosed (or figure it out for themselves).

    I still try very hard to 'act normal' in the outside world, but at home, I don't try as hard as I used to. It takes so much energy and it is a big relief to not worry about it at home.

    Somehow having an explanation makes it easier to let my guard down around people i am close to because i don't need to try to explain it all. they can google it if they want to understand. before i knew i was autistic, there was nothing to google and i could not explain.

  4. I so love your blog and your lists especially. Totally agree on the phone thing! Perspective is the key, isn't it? Missy

  5. Dear Bev, i've been around for a while and i love your perspective. Another excellent post, even though my favorite is (and probably always will be) "to whom it may concern" - you got us all there! Thanks for sharing! fatima

  6. I don't entirely get the obsession with whether someone is doing something "because it seems autistic" or not.

    I mean, suppose the person actually is.

    Well then... so what?

    Does that make what they're doing bad in some way?

    I mean, may be a sign of insecurity or something, but most people are insecure sometimes, and... yeah.

  7. I just found your blog this morning. I think it is just delightful!! By the way, my junior draws circles.

  8. You sure like the number 8, don't you? Eight this, eight that. I like numbers, too. Like 448, because to me, it means autism. And guess what, it is 8 * 56! Nice user name.

    I agree with lori about people getting "more autistic-like" after recieving the diagnosis. Though i was diagnosed early, I didn't really know much about my autism until i was 13. I researched it intensly, noticed my traits, some of them declined while others went up. I'm getting even more uncomfortable with eye contact, for it scares me to look at someone right into they eye. i've also gotten braggy about my autism, as if i were to tell the whole world.

  9. Yes, Bigtimesynsthete, I do. I had noticed and admired your avatar before, I think on AFF. My personal number is 64, thus square8. Thank you for the 8th comment to this post!

    A Bishop's Wife: I do circles sometimes, too. Man/woman does not live by squares alone. Circles are very good for calming, whereas squares are for organizing thoughts.

    Ballastexistenz: I have been sending the article called Help! I Seem to Be Getting More Autistic to many acquaintances this week. It has been very useful and encouraging to me personally.

    Thank you all for the feedback. I do enjoy writing lists and visiting the blogs of people I had not known about before!

  10. I must say I do #1 myself. I also photograph lampposts, pylons, telephone poles and bricks.

    Sometimes I draw squares but I'm more of a cube person. Some days I'm partial to triangles.

  11. Personally I like six times six is thirty six better. xD

    And I like how you made the 8 of spades card which had like two 5 patterns with two shared spades in-between. =P


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