Tuesday, March 6, 2007

A failure to communicate

If you don't understand what I say, it's my fault, and if I don't understand what you say it's my fault. Right? How does that work again?

The first in a series of real life Aspie said/NT said communication failures:

NT: Here's a book you might like.
Aspie: Thanks. Maybe we should have an exchange.
NT: I am tired of arguing with you!

What went wrong here? NT interpreted the word "exchange" as meaning a disagreement, rather than a "trade" or "sharing" as was intended. Aspie had thought the meaning obvious in context. NT might have been reading some imagined nonverbal face or body language, I don't know. Life is so much less confusing when you don't make assumptions or read between the lines.

1 comment:

  1. I remembre being hit as a kid over such misunderstandings. I also remember a teacher that smacked me and another who pulled me off the ground with my hair for such misunderstandings. And being sent to the principal's office for yet another misunderstanding of the sort.

    As I mature, the misunderstandings are more subtle, especially as I become more self-aware, yet they are still there.


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